A man staggers into an emergency room with 2 black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally the Doctor asks him what happened.
"Well it was like this" said the man. "I was playing a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her golf ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows has something white on its rear end. I went over and lifted its tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball......stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake."
"What did you do?" asks the Doctor.
"Well, I turned to my wife and yelled, Hey, this looks like yours!"
*******************************************************
"I bet you don't know what day this is", said the wife to her husband as he made his way out the front door. The husband was perplexed, but was always a quick thinker: "Of course I do, my dear. How could I forget!?" With that, he turned and rushed to catch the bus for work.
At 10 AM, the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box containing a dozen long stemmed red roses.
At 1 PM, a foil wrapped, two pound box of her favorite chocolates arrived. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.
The husband was smug when he returned from work, satisfied that he had recovered what could have been a very bad situation.
His wife was indeed surprised: "First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed, "I've never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"
"Well it was like this" said the man. "I was playing a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her golf ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows has something white on its rear end. I went over and lifted its tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball......stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake."
"What did you do?" asks the Doctor.
"Well, I turned to my wife and yelled, Hey, this looks like yours!"
*******************************************************
"I bet you don't know what day this is", said the wife to her husband as he made his way out the front door. The husband was perplexed, but was always a quick thinker: "Of course I do, my dear. How could I forget!?" With that, he turned and rushed to catch the bus for work.
At 10 AM, the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box containing a dozen long stemmed red roses.
At 1 PM, a foil wrapped, two pound box of her favorite chocolates arrived. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.
The husband was smug when he returned from work, satisfied that he had recovered what could have been a very bad situation.
His wife was indeed surprised: "First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed, "I've never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"
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